'House of Gucci' Review
R: Language, some sexual content, and brief nudity and violence
Runtime: 2 Hrs and 37 Minutes
Production Companies: Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer, Bron Creative, Scott Free Productions
Distributor: United Artists Releasing
Director: Ridley Scott
Writers: Becky Johnston, Roberto Bentivegna
Cast: Lady Gaga, Adam Driver, Jared Leto, Jeremy Irons, Salma Hayek, Al Pacino
Release Date: November 24, 2021
In Theaters Only
When Patrizia Reggiani, an outsider from humble beginnings, marries into the Gucci family, her unbridled ambition begins to unravel their legacy and triggers a reckless spiral of betrayal, decadence, revenge, and ultimately… murder.
Lady Gaga’s performance as Patrizia Reggiani, in her sophomore feature as a leading actress, is a great effort. Despite her overly-exaggerated Italian accent that plays like a bit on a really bad SNL skit, Gaga commands the screen with unbridled power. She delivers an irresistible, forceful, slimy, and manipulative nature. It’s the defining factor that keeps you enthralled for the film’s ride. The same goes for Adam Driver as Maurizio Gucci who, by gosh, tries his best to keep the film rolling with his committed and charismatic presence. If it ain’t them, then it’s Al Pacino, who is pitch-perfect. Out of the entire ensemble, he stands on top, bringing an effortlessly charming life to the film even when it’s completely dead in the water. He has amazing chemistry with just about everyone and his onscreen presence put a smile on my face. Gaga, Driver, and Pacino are working their hardest to make this bio-drama work, but there’s no way a variety of committed performances can be enough to polish a turd.
Director Ridley Scott is known to have a hard-working ethic when it comes to the output of films he helms. Ever so often, he’d release two different movies within the same year where one would significantly triumph over the other. So… you know, congrats to The Last Duel for being the better Ridley Scott movie of 2021 because House of Gucci ain’t it, chief. Despite being one of the most visionary filmmakers of his era (well, more or less since the quality of his work is inconsistent), Scott had to be one of the least-qualified filmmakers to bring this prolific Gucci family scandal to life. For a keystone moment in history within the fashion community, Scott provides surface-level direction that lacks any sense of energy or excitement. At times, Scott teases the thought of delving into a campy tone, but whenever he dips his feet into the pool he immediately runs in the opposite direction. As far as camp goes, the best he does is have his ensemble deliver unbearably cartoonish Italian accents. Nearly every actor is on a different playing field where some are doing over-the-top accents (Gaga, Leto, Driver) and some are just barely altering their normal voice (Jeremy Irons, Al Pacino). The film’s brief silly moments are undercut by poor pacing and editing, where scenes are either too abrupt or linger for too long to make an impact.
After the first hour, which elaborates on the rags-to-riches romance between Patrizia and Maurizio, all entertainment value is rinsed away. As Scott skirts around bringing any style or energy whatsoever to this vast drama full of betrayal, the execution couldn’t have been any duller. Mind you, the film bears an unnecessarily long two-hour and 37-minute runtime, which quickly made House of Gucci go from being a challenge to being a chore to sit through. The longer the narrative progressed, the more transparent it became that Gucci's story and Ridley Scott bear little to no compatibility. Yeah, the best he does is showcase the lavish and high-class lifestyle the Gucci family lead with scenery and location, but nothing about them ever feels extravagant, especially with depicting the significance of the brand they used to own.
This is the sort of narrative that a director with a deep understanding of this drama and the industry can make pop. At first, I thought of how any director who worked on Succession could’ve done this, but then I boiled it down to Cathy Yan. She would’ve killed this project, for she’d nail the savage and chaotic energy between the Gucci family presented in such a comedic light. Hell, Craig Gillespie, who helmed the likes of Cruella, I, Tonya, and that upcoming Pam & Tommy miniseries would’ve killed this as well. He could’ve condensed and streamlined the story, positioning Patrizia’s POV instead of it being so cluttered with everyone else in the Gucci family. Hell, even though he might’ve OD’ed on music cues, he’d pick some solid fits! These are the thoughts that went through my mind while watching the film, for it was a far more intriguing conversation than whatever was happening onscreen.
Aside from the hollow direction, the screenplay by Becky Johnston and Roberto Bentivegna bogs the film down due to the lack of personality and the bland dialogue. The script suffers from a balanced tone to give the overall story a consistent identity. Much like the scenes themselves, there are so many areas that could’ve been cut to deliver a cohesive flow. It has a banger soundtrack but also poorly-timed cues. A lot of the music, ranging from George Michael to Blondie, is integrated like placeholders until the editor finds a better use for them.
While I was already bored by the movie due to its bloat and dullness, it became damn near unbearable to watch once Jared Leto and his fat suit walked right through the door. Jared Leto delivers his best emulation of Johnny Depp if he was auditioning to play Super Mario in a live-action film. He does this high-pitched, eccentric motion thing that is on a completely different wavelength than just about everyone else. On one hand, he’s so bad that he keeps you awake (because that’s how boring this movie is), but on the other hand, he’s so grating that you get a pounding headache. Between him and Gaga, the over-the-top Italian accents are so cartoonish that whenever they’re onscreen you just wait for one of them to say, “Now we hunt moose and squirrel.” During the extensive second act, Ridley Scott played Russian Roulette with Jared Leto, its most prominent player. The longer he’s on screen, the more he loses his integrity. He was grating, I had a migraine, and I can’t wait for Leto to be nominated for a Golden Globe.
God, what else is there to say about this snoozefest of a bio-drama? Miscast, misdirected, and such a slog of a tonally messy movie with no flair to fill its hollow void. House Of Gucci is a drawn-out cartoonish bio-drama masked as an awards contender. Cathy Yan was right there, just saying.
