'Uncharted' Review: Drake's Misfortune
PG-13: For violence/action and language
Runtime: 1 Hr and 56 Minutes
Production Companies: Arad Productions, Atlas Entertainment, PlayStation Productions
Distributor: Columbia Pictures (Sony)
Director: Ruben Fleischer
Writers: Rafe Lee Judkins, Art Marcum, Matt Holloway
Cast: Tom Holland, Mark Wahlberg, Sophia Ali, Tati Gabrielle, Antonio Banderas
Release Date: February 18, 2022
In Theaters Only
Street-smart Nathan Drake (Tom Holland) is recruited by seasoned treasure hunter Victor "Sully" Sullivan (Mark Wahlberg) to recover a fortune amassed by Ferdinand Magellan and lost 500 years ago by the House of Moncada. What starts as a heist job for the duo becomes a globe-trotting, white-knuckle race to reach the prize before the ruthless Santiago Moncada (Antonio Banderas), who believes he and his family are the rightful heirs. If Nate and Sully can decipher the clues and solve one of the world's oldest mysteries, they stand to find $5 billion in treasure and perhaps even Nate's long-lost brother...but only if they can learn to work together.
Since 2008, the Uncharted movie has been shifting from director to director, including David O. Russell, Seth Gordon, Dan Trachtenberg, Travis Knight, Neil Burger, and Shawn Levy… who all departed from the project to work on something else. In the end, Venom and Zombieland director Ruben Fleischer was chosen to bring the iconic Playstation/Naughty Dog game series to life. Surprisingly, Fleischer’s direction is a major positive aspect of the adaptation, primarily regarding the action set pieces. He does the source material justice by going all out in bringing some of the notable mechanics to life. There are action sequences centered on platforming, puzzle-solving, stealth, and combat, which are the hallmarks of any adventure film, but the way Fleischer maps it out is entertaining. Granted, there are no guns or grenades in Drake’s arsenal. Maybe we’ll get 'em in the sequel or whatever but the way Fleischer handles the set pieces range from swashbuckling fun to damn near breathtaking shots.
The entirety of the cargo plane set-piece stripped from Drake’s Deception is phenomenal and perhaps worth witnessing on the big screen. Everything centered around that sequence resembles the titular game the most. When the film opens in media res style similar to the structure of Among Thieves, you’re thrown right into the fray of Drake scaling cargo boxes to enter the plane before it cuts to where the adventure begins. When that moment returns with context to the story, it’s even more exhilarating. Between that and the exciting climax featuring two ships being flown by helicopters, the set pieces are remarkably fun. Plus, the action is well-edited so you don’t need to worry about those annoying jump cuts you see in most American-made action movies lately.
Just like everyone else, I was completely turned off by the announcement that Tom Holland and Marky Mark were cast as Nate and Sully. It’s almost like the casting agent used a randomizer wheel, but there’s one person who managed to run the gamut of the movie, accurately portraying the character as if they’re stripped right out of the game: Sophia Ali. Though the material she’s given is far from great, Sophia Ali is grade-A perfection as Chloe. She is the only person who embodies the likeness of the character, nailing her entire personality and skillset. When the film pairs her with Tom Holland, they show some chemistry that resembles the personalities of the characters. Ali elevates the movie alongside Tati Gabrielle, who plays the villainous femme fatale mercenary Jo Braddock. She’s so unhinged and menacing that you can’t keep your eyes off her. They’re living proof of how high the bar should’ve been set when it came to casting because I don’t know who the hell Tom Holland and Mark Wahlberg were portraying.
Throughout quarantine, I finally leaned into the games that were sitting in my PS4 library, aka a ton of Uncharted. I instantly fell in love with the games and understood why it became the phenomenon that it was. What made people love the Uncharted franchise wasn’t just the platforming or the QTE’s or adventures, it was the characterization of Nathan Drake, Elena Fisher, Victor Sullivan, and Chloe Frazer, who all had distinct personalities and dynamics with one another. It’s a franchise known for its characters full of personality, but this feature adaptation fails to have one. In a time where video game movies are actually becoming good again, Uncharted follows the status quo of being a disappointment to just about everyone.
While this adaptation is meant to be a cinematic origin story for Nathan Drake in the contemporary age, writers Rafe Lee Judkins, Art Marcum, and Matt Holloway can’t quite piece together what made Drake such a compelling character. Instead of exploring his family’s legacy, he’s given a bland backstory and gets separated from his older brother Sam, who gives him his iconic ring. Whatever spunk, cynical, wise-ass traits Drake is known for are completely neutered due to the terrible writing and miscasting of Tom Holland. I’m sorry, he’s just not Nathan Drake no matter how many MCU-type quips you give him because, at this point, all you see is Spider-Man. And don’t get me started with Mark “say hi to your Sully for me” Wahlberg as Sully. The miscasting speaks for itself and the execution is even further evidence.
I get that video game adaptations are usually broad enough to appeal to the general masses but the lazy dialogue writing felt as if it was crafted by an AI’s attempt at humor, diluting all the traits Nathan Drake and Sully are known for. Holland and Wahlberg are portraying versions of themselves but in an Indiana Jones clone. What makes this more egregiously frustrating is how it’s smug enough to do the bare minimum fan service with little easter eggs, ranging from giving Tom Holland Nathan Drake’s jacket from Uncharted 3: Drake’s Deception to a game actor’s cameo (you know who) which would’ve been cool if it had some decent casting or hell, good writing to begin with.
Man, Ruben Fleischer was doing so much heavy lifting behind the camera because whenever I see Art Marcum and Matt Holloway’s names in writing credits I run the other way. Don’t say, “But they wrote Iron Man, though.” Do you know how it’s been since Iron Man came out?! After the hell that was Men in Black: International and Transformers: The Last Knight –– you know, the one where they insinuate that Frederick Douglas and Harriet Tubman were friends with Transformers –– I knew I had to set the bar low. While this is a sizable improvement over their last two efforts, it doesn’t mean jack shit because it’s as bland as store-brand cereal. All of the humor completely falls flat, emphasizing modern references for one-liners and quips the same way the MCU does, such as Sully spewing lines like, “Hold your horses, Jack Sparrow,” or Drake laughing at Sully for having Tinder and too many apps open. The good one-liners are few and far between, mostly happening during the final act, but it never resembles anything close to the source characters. The way Sully and Nate meet is bland as they spout exposition instead of becoming naturally acquainted with each other. The adventure itself is generic, the puzzle-solving is basic, and the action locations are so damn uninspired that one of them includes Tati Gabrielle kicking Mark Wahlberg’s ass in a Papa John’s in Spain. This damn movie was in development hell for over a decade and this is the best they could deliver? The movie even tries to push a moral theme of trust when the characters are literal thieves. This is a heist adventure full of backstabbing and betrayal. What's with this kiddie trust shit?
Uncharted could’ve been genuinely good. You can tell by the well-directed and entertaining action sequences, plus Sophia Ali’s performance since she actually understood the assignment. Due to the thinly-written script and egregious miscasting that will alienate just about everyone familiar with the source games, Uncharted ends up being a hollow shell of better adventure films you could watch. You’ll get more entertainment value from watching a full walkthrough and cutscenes of any of the Uncharted games than this two-hour bland fest.
Seriously, please stop hiring Art Marcum and Matt Holloway for screenwriting duties, I beg of you.
